#52. Garbage Dumb Experience

GOD:

"Look Son, I want you to tell all of your followers about the hell-thing."

Jesus:

"OK gang, listen up, I have some good news and some bad news from my Father. If you remain in touch with God, your life on earth will be a heavenly experience. However, if you remain stuck in your arrogance and stay disconnected from God, you are going to end up in the depths of dispair. You shall be in mental anguish and emotional torment all the days of your life. You will think you're going crazy! You will not be able to think clearly. You will be full of fear and turmoil. And you will feel that God is a million miles away and that He does not care about you at all. Most of you will have this hellish experience every time you screw up. So stay in touch with God and experience the good life."

Jesus:

"How did I do, Dad?"

GOD:

"My Son, you are such a dinwit! You know very well that those heathen are going to die and literally be thrown into the Gehena Garbage Pile -- and that they will be there day in and day out forever. They need to know that the land fill is a real place outside of Jerusalem where the fire burns relentlessly to get rid of the terrible stench. You should also have informed them that they will weep a lot, that they will wail a lot, and that they will gnash their teeth a lot -- so they need to remember their dentures. And, oh yeah, you forgot to tell them how excruciatingly hot the fire will be. Really, Son, why do you have to use all those parables anyway? Why didn't you just speak to them the literal truth?"

#51. Put a Face to the Voice!

When I talk to someone on the phone for the first time, I often form a picture in my mind of what they look like. Later, if I meet them in person, they always look completely different from my preconceived image. In over 60 years of conversing on the phone, it has never happened that my image of their facial appearance has turned out to be correct! How can that be?

Do you also imagine what the voice on the other end of the line looks like? Have you ever been accurate -- even once? Why is this?

If a picture is worth a thousand words, then why wouldn't a thousand words be worth a picture? Go figure!

Of course, the same is true if you hear a speaker or a singer on a CD. And then their is radio. I have listened to many talk-show hosts on the radio, but when I see a photo of them -- or see them in person -- they always throw me a curve by looking like someone else! Why don't they play fair? I just don't get it! Maybe that's why they are on the radio -- they have a face made for radio!

What do you think? Give me some help, will you!